Today Emma is writing about No one tells you that...
Can you blame me? Running around chasing a little toddler, changing clothes, changing nappies, feeding, warming his milk, walking around the same tree for the twenty second time, it’s time for his nap but new things are far more exciting and he’s fighting me again as i try to put him to bed, all that makes a trip to the most beautiful spot on Earth look like, well, too much work. I couldn’t help wondering – is it all worth it? Isn’t just staying at home easier, if you don’t get to enjoy the views anyway?
Sounds depressing, I know. And you know where I went wrong? My expectations were way too high. Deep down there I was automatically expecting the trips to be the same as when we were a childless couple. I expected the freedom, the excitement of breaking the routine, all the things you no longer have after becoming a parent – especially if your baby is still little.
When we decided on going away for the last trip to celebrate the New Year, one of my big changes planned for the New Year was to make every trip a fun one – for me. I figured that if I lower my expectations a bit – it’s a win-win. So I sat down and made myself imagine the whole thing in details. Yes, I won’t be able to sleep in because Eric wakes up early – but I can take a nap in the afternoon when he’s getting his sleep. No, we can’t go hiking for a day – but we can have a nice walk around the lake for an hour, carrying Eric in the backpack. No, we can’t hit the local bars for half a night – but we can make cocktails in the cottage and toast to the New Year when the kid is asleep upstairs.
It is funny how this little exercise helped me. Instead of sitting there, totally down and feeling sorry for myself, I actually liked this trip. It was different kind of fun – but I did enjoy it and all I had to do for this to happen, was to change the way I think.
Here is the thing: if you liked the life you were living, it is difficult to accept that it has changed and will never be the same. So the choice is really simple: be miserable and keep wanting what you can’t have – or learn to appreciate what you have got. I am choosing the second.
What about you? How difficult was it for you to adjust your lifestyle to your baby’s needs? How long did it take you? And how are you doing now?